Thursday, April 15, 2010

"Great Expectations"


No, not the book by Charles Dickens…. but expectations in life. So, as I’ve mentioned last time I came back to Thailand to do a month long teachers training with a teacher that I had met her when I was here in Koh Phangan in January. She really sold herself the day I talk to her about the training and also all the information she sent about the course, her background etc. Oh course I had expectations coming here but sometimes those expectations are not met…unfortunately this has been one of those times. After day two I knew the next twenty six days were going to be a real struggle. I won’t go into details but basically her teaching methods and ego are most challenging for me to handle. I know I’m not the only one and we have talked to her about it and in some ways things have gotten a bit more tolerable but only just! So, what I’ve had to do is to look at the positives of all this.(let me mention that there would be no way of getting a refund and the fact that I spent time and money getting back here to do this, I’ve decided I will stick it out)

First off, I am back staying at an amazingly beautiful place and I can wake up and go for a swim in the ocean before class, eat wonderful Thai food everyday, meet new and interesting people not to mention do yoga everyday and learn something new…..even if I don’t always jive with it. What I have realized that even with the negatives, I’m learning a lot about myself and things I will and won’t do in teaching yoga. This has also made me look at how much I have already learned from some truly amazing teachers since I’ve been studying yoga. Even Lilly(the teacher here) has much to teach me, I just have to leave myself open to all possibilities. So that’s not to say that I’m not counting the days because I am and everyday there seems something to challenge me. Who said life wasn’t a challenge!

I think that we should all have great expectations in life but need to just show up, pay attention and not get attached to the outcome………….and hope for the best 

Just a note to add to this blog; I wrote this almost two weeks ago now and haven't had a chance to post it. So, the count down continues but today is Friday and we have a day off tomorrow!! I'm going to get through it. It has been exceptionally hot and I feel as though I'm melting half the time but it's still beautiful and the early mornings are wonderful.
Here is a few more photos from Koh Samui. Thanks to all of you for being here for me whether I've heard from you or not...your in my heart and my thoughts.
www.picasaweb.google.com/tonibodeau/morekohsamui